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Post by prv31wife on Jan 19, 2006 15:54:37 GMT -5
I hope you all can give us some ideas. Unfortunately because we allowed what we thought was safe children's programing into our home my children have picked up some mean names to call each other. My nine year old is really bad at this. I tried pointing to scripture and explaining to them why this is wrong but it has stopped. Can someone please advise on what to do?
They also hit each other and that is driving me crazy!
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Post by Brother Ben on Jan 19, 2006 20:51:06 GMT -5
We have always taught our children to be kind to one another, but their little sin nature will usually pop up with this type of behaviour. We started using "correction" time as a time to teach the children what the bible has to say about their particular infraction.
We bought the book, 'Proverbs for Parenting,' by Decker, ISBN 0-9618606-3-9. The ordering address in the book is Lynn's Bookshelf, P.O. Box 2224, Boise, ID 83701. It is simply verses from the Book of Proverbs, but it is arranged topically and is very helpful in looking up Proverbs for instruction on a particular area.
Whether the children "deeply" understand the verse or not is not the issue. The bible says,
Psa 119:130 The entrance of thy words giveth light; it giveth understanding unto the simple.
Isa 55:11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.
Begin taking the children every time (that's the hard part,) they transgress in this area, show them what the Bible says, and set the rules and consequences.
Below are some verses you could show them about using unkind words.
Pro 6:12 A naughty person, a wicked man, walketh with a froward mouth.
Pro 10:32 The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable: but the mouth of the wicked speaketh frowardness.
Pro 21:23 Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles.
Pro 4:24 Put away from thee a froward mouth, and perverse lips put far from thee.
Pro 6:2 Thou art snared with the words of thy mouth, thou art taken with the words of thy mouth.
Pro 8:13 The fear of the LORD is to hate evil: pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, and the froward mouth, do I hate.
Verses for the setting of consequences.
Pro 14:3 In the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride: but the lips of the wise shall preserve them.
Pro 18:6 A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.
Pro 21:23 Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles.
Pro 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
Pro 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Pro 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Help them to understand that this is the only way God knows of the change their use of unkind words. Eventually with consistencey and loving but firm application of the rod will bring lasting results.
When a transgression occurs calmly pull the child aside and show them what they are doing. Show them what God has to say about it. With a calm, firm, loving spirit, apply corporal punishment. Hug your child to your bossom and kiss their cheek and pray with them. Ask God to help them to change the way they use their mouth, and to for give them for sinning against the counsel of the Lord and their sibbling.This is the only way I know how to deal with it.
In regards to hitting, I would use the same course of action. Find a scripture like the following:
Pro 28:17 A man that doeth violence to the blood of any person shall flee to the pit; let no man stay him.
I wouldn't hesitate for a second to point out that one of the characteristics of people who will not be in heaven is their violent deeds! I would tell them how much I love them and that I want them to be in heaven with me and then firmly but lovingly apply correction.
Also, I think it important to point out here that reconciliation is important. We make our children say, "I'm sorry," and hug and kiss. We want our children to think their sibblings are their very best friends.
Each child is different and some will change with the simple instruction of the parent, some are like a stubborn donkey, you know the ones.
May the Lord bless you as you commit to raising children that will be a blessing to their family, their community, and to the kingdom of God.
Bro. Ben
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Post by prv31wife on Jan 20, 2006 17:15:45 GMT -5
Thank you so much! I'm going to mark these verses and I will have the girls write them out so they can be reminded not to do this and will know what will happen if they continue to sin in this area.
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Post by benshelpmeet on Feb 21, 2006 16:36:18 GMT -5
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Post by benshelpmeet on Feb 23, 2006 15:02:00 GMT -5
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