Post by Brother Ben on Dec 11, 2005 12:05:15 GMT -5
Pro 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Tit 1:15 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
Over the years, by the grace of God, we have had a vision to have pure children. I must say from the onset, this is a joint effort. Husband and wife must be together on this way. In the event of a single mom or dad, draw from the brethren, it is God's way. Our prayers are with you.
When I say pure, I am not talking about sinless because we all know about the individual struggle with the old nature and the salvation and sanctification of our children. But, we have been so aware that these young ones, on loan from God, are to be raised up in such a way that they will have a great resevoir of holy teachings and examples to draw from.
Though we started in a more traditional setting, i.e., television, videos, letting the children play in a wild and foolish way with other children, thank God, we finally saw the light and started making drastic changes before it was too late. We always employed correction when necessary, and have been blessed by God in obeying that command. Likewise I have seen the unpleasant fruit of failing to obey that same command in my own parenting. This is an area we need to be diligent in for the rod of correction is not an act of anger, hate, or revenge, but a holy act of love on behalf of your child's future. Everyone your child will ever interact with the rest of their life will benefit from your faithfulness in this area.
I again must confess, it was God who began this work in us.
1Th 5:24 Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.
We were consciencious of "influencers," in our childrens lives. Friends, family, media, and fashion. We knew that God's principles were reliable and we wanted to apply them and reap the benefits.
Friends. A friend is a person who has a special place in your heart and life and therefore has the ability to influence our children. Because we raised our children around church and church people the friends we are talking about were the children of other Christians. As we noticed our childrens struggles with negative behaviour, we saw a direct connection to bad behaviour and time spent with certain types of children.
1Co 15:33 Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.
We became very vigilant about what was going on in our childrens Sunday Schools, Children's Church, etc. As we began noticing things that the teachers allowed that were unacceptable to us we took action. You should address these issues with the teachers and workers. Some will be humble and sensative to your observation and do something about it. Praise God for that, but some, in pride, will basically tell you to but out of their business...which we did, child included. We have had to pull our children from classes and programs. I am writing this because I know many if not most of you are in that type of church program. We have pulled away and only practice "family worship" now. Our children have plenty of time with other children, but we worship and learn of the Lord "together," it is a blessing.
If their are "little friends" in the neighborhood, or who like to come over to your house. You are to be the "hound of Heaven" for your children. We have told many a sassy child "just how they are going to act" at our house and around our children. We even correct the cussing college students in line at Wal-Mart. Bless God, let the Redeemed of the Lord say so! My children don't always have the wisdom they need for their own good and I am going to help them be careful little ears, eyes, mouthes, ... you know the song. Until they get saved and submit their wills unto God you are their sanctifier. If the "little friends" don't mind, send them on their way. Remember, you have God's little child there in your care. Forget what Mrs. or Sister So-and-so has to say about it, but always try to maintain a godly sweet Christian attitude when instructing them.
Family. This one is a strong one. We know of peole who have absolutely NO control over their children when it comes to their parents. We know of a couple that their parents buy their children very ungodly toys and such. When it comes to our family, like anyone else who has influence, we must train them. We have had these issues with our family members. Grandma doesn't like a spanking, Auntie doesn't like that the girls have to wear dresses, Grandpa likes to say things that are uncareful, etc. You must take control. I love family and I know the old saying, "Blood is thicker than water," but I am NOT going to surrender my children over to someone else. I am all for family unity, but if there is a family member that will not relent in the area of being a bad influence, do what you have to do, but do something. If proximity is a problem, pray about moving, or God moving them. A visit is better than a constant barrage. Cousins, uncles, aunts, etc., unless you know and are very sure that they share the same or very similar convictions that you...be careful. Little mouthes love to tell your children little stories that trouble their hearts and minds.
Media. This one is really quite simple. Throw out the television, the vcr/dvd, get rid of AM/FM radios in your childrens rooms, worldly books, magazines, and children's books! There. That's a good start! When we got rid of our t.v. and vcr, all the tapes, etc. back in 2000, we were liberated! Our children were blessed by this move. We had alread made a radical sweep through all of our videos, but there still was that nagging feeling that something was not right. Since we got rid of it the children use thier time interacting with each other, drawing (quite well too) sewing, crocheting, (obviously I have six girls) but even Benjamin grew in his appreciation and activities outdoors. He has always been an avid reader and this just gave him more opportunites to strengthin that good habit. He is like a walking Encyclopedia, Darlene and I love it. Who needs t.v., we just get Benjamin going. Of course we have influenced him on his reading, but he, being 18, is old enough to make good choices. But I must also add, he makes good choices because at critical times in his life, we drew a line in the sand and said, "that's it, no further," and God has blessed.
Be so careful about childrens books and such. There is so much New Age, witchcraft, and rebellion in stuff. I know of Christians who think it is good that the children read Harry (wicked) Potter because at least they're reading! Hogwash! Media is an input and your childs mind is the recorder. Even though we got rid of videos, our older children can still quote Pooh video scenes, I can too. Remember all them old "hippy" songs!
They will remember the media you let program their minds.
Rom 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
Rom 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
We have taken up learning to sing ACapella and teach the children parts. That is primarily what we listen to except for some selected classical music and gospel music. They excell in this area and all you need is a hymn book and a pitch pipe (we don't have a pitch pipe yet, but Benjamin can usually hit the starting note well.)
Fashion. The whore of Babylon, via your community. We made war! Against whom? Cool and all his wicked cronies. You know, "That hat is cool! Those are cool sneakers! That is a cool shirt!" Death to cool and all his associates. This is one of the reasons plain and simple was like fitting hand in glove. Let me tell you the parable of Sister X. The name has been changed to protect the innocent. This is a true story. There was a family in a church we went to. The mother and daughter were chaste and modest. Things changed in that church and we left. I walking through Sam's club one day and here came sister X...I think... Her long hair was cut off, she had big dangly ear rings on, her make-up was spakled on thick, she had on a black leather jacket, and pants. I politely said hello and she just walked past. I couldn't believe my eyes. How sad. Soon we saw the two daughters, they went the way of the world also. Fashion won the war.
Notice the following observations:
Pro 7:9 In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night:
Pro 7:10 And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.
There is an attire that is associated with being a harlot.
Pro 7:11 (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house:
Your outward is a manifestation of your inward.
Pro 7:12 Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.)
The liberated fashion conscieous woman or yourng lady in NOT in her place.
Pro 7:13 So she caught him, and kissed him, and with an impudent face said unto him,
Her behaviour is adversly affected becasue she fits in with the world. She has her eye on your man or boy!
Pro 7:14 I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows.
She goes to your church! I hope not, I pray not, but there it is in black and white.
I used to tell the worldly church girls in a youth group I taught once, when you are living in a trailor, have two or three kids (goats not lambs) up under your feet, the man you live with is not your husband, you have no car, and no one cares about you, you'll remember old Bro. Smith giving you the riot act about dressing modestly and acting chaste! We have been back to that church, we have seen the fulfillment, how utterly sad. Thank God, He is the Lord of second and third chances, but I want my children to go to the altar in glorious, brilliant, pure white. How about you?
Pure children, with countenance bright
Pure children, that walk in light.
Pure children, that love Mom and Dad.
Pure children, that know good from bad.
Pure children, who love God's word.
Pure children, who do what they've heard.
Pure children, that sing of the Christ.
Pure children, will you pay the price?
From my heart,
Bro. Ben
Tit 1:15 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
Over the years, by the grace of God, we have had a vision to have pure children. I must say from the onset, this is a joint effort. Husband and wife must be together on this way. In the event of a single mom or dad, draw from the brethren, it is God's way. Our prayers are with you.
When I say pure, I am not talking about sinless because we all know about the individual struggle with the old nature and the salvation and sanctification of our children. But, we have been so aware that these young ones, on loan from God, are to be raised up in such a way that they will have a great resevoir of holy teachings and examples to draw from.
Though we started in a more traditional setting, i.e., television, videos, letting the children play in a wild and foolish way with other children, thank God, we finally saw the light and started making drastic changes before it was too late. We always employed correction when necessary, and have been blessed by God in obeying that command. Likewise I have seen the unpleasant fruit of failing to obey that same command in my own parenting. This is an area we need to be diligent in for the rod of correction is not an act of anger, hate, or revenge, but a holy act of love on behalf of your child's future. Everyone your child will ever interact with the rest of their life will benefit from your faithfulness in this area.
I again must confess, it was God who began this work in us.
1Th 5:24 Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.
We were consciencious of "influencers," in our childrens lives. Friends, family, media, and fashion. We knew that God's principles were reliable and we wanted to apply them and reap the benefits.
Friends. A friend is a person who has a special place in your heart and life and therefore has the ability to influence our children. Because we raised our children around church and church people the friends we are talking about were the children of other Christians. As we noticed our childrens struggles with negative behaviour, we saw a direct connection to bad behaviour and time spent with certain types of children.
1Co 15:33 Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.
We became very vigilant about what was going on in our childrens Sunday Schools, Children's Church, etc. As we began noticing things that the teachers allowed that were unacceptable to us we took action. You should address these issues with the teachers and workers. Some will be humble and sensative to your observation and do something about it. Praise God for that, but some, in pride, will basically tell you to but out of their business...which we did, child included. We have had to pull our children from classes and programs. I am writing this because I know many if not most of you are in that type of church program. We have pulled away and only practice "family worship" now. Our children have plenty of time with other children, but we worship and learn of the Lord "together," it is a blessing.
If their are "little friends" in the neighborhood, or who like to come over to your house. You are to be the "hound of Heaven" for your children. We have told many a sassy child "just how they are going to act" at our house and around our children. We even correct the cussing college students in line at Wal-Mart. Bless God, let the Redeemed of the Lord say so! My children don't always have the wisdom they need for their own good and I am going to help them be careful little ears, eyes, mouthes, ... you know the song. Until they get saved and submit their wills unto God you are their sanctifier. If the "little friends" don't mind, send them on their way. Remember, you have God's little child there in your care. Forget what Mrs. or Sister So-and-so has to say about it, but always try to maintain a godly sweet Christian attitude when instructing them.
Family. This one is a strong one. We know of peole who have absolutely NO control over their children when it comes to their parents. We know of a couple that their parents buy their children very ungodly toys and such. When it comes to our family, like anyone else who has influence, we must train them. We have had these issues with our family members. Grandma doesn't like a spanking, Auntie doesn't like that the girls have to wear dresses, Grandpa likes to say things that are uncareful, etc. You must take control. I love family and I know the old saying, "Blood is thicker than water," but I am NOT going to surrender my children over to someone else. I am all for family unity, but if there is a family member that will not relent in the area of being a bad influence, do what you have to do, but do something. If proximity is a problem, pray about moving, or God moving them. A visit is better than a constant barrage. Cousins, uncles, aunts, etc., unless you know and are very sure that they share the same or very similar convictions that you...be careful. Little mouthes love to tell your children little stories that trouble their hearts and minds.
Media. This one is really quite simple. Throw out the television, the vcr/dvd, get rid of AM/FM radios in your childrens rooms, worldly books, magazines, and children's books! There. That's a good start! When we got rid of our t.v. and vcr, all the tapes, etc. back in 2000, we were liberated! Our children were blessed by this move. We had alread made a radical sweep through all of our videos, but there still was that nagging feeling that something was not right. Since we got rid of it the children use thier time interacting with each other, drawing (quite well too) sewing, crocheting, (obviously I have six girls) but even Benjamin grew in his appreciation and activities outdoors. He has always been an avid reader and this just gave him more opportunites to strengthin that good habit. He is like a walking Encyclopedia, Darlene and I love it. Who needs t.v., we just get Benjamin going. Of course we have influenced him on his reading, but he, being 18, is old enough to make good choices. But I must also add, he makes good choices because at critical times in his life, we drew a line in the sand and said, "that's it, no further," and God has blessed.
Be so careful about childrens books and such. There is so much New Age, witchcraft, and rebellion in stuff. I know of Christians who think it is good that the children read Harry (wicked) Potter because at least they're reading! Hogwash! Media is an input and your childs mind is the recorder. Even though we got rid of videos, our older children can still quote Pooh video scenes, I can too. Remember all them old "hippy" songs!
They will remember the media you let program their minds.Rom 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
Rom 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
We have taken up learning to sing ACapella and teach the children parts. That is primarily what we listen to except for some selected classical music and gospel music. They excell in this area and all you need is a hymn book and a pitch pipe (we don't have a pitch pipe yet, but Benjamin can usually hit the starting note well.)
Fashion. The whore of Babylon, via your community. We made war! Against whom? Cool and all his wicked cronies. You know, "That hat is cool! Those are cool sneakers! That is a cool shirt!" Death to cool and all his associates. This is one of the reasons plain and simple was like fitting hand in glove. Let me tell you the parable of Sister X. The name has been changed to protect the innocent. This is a true story. There was a family in a church we went to. The mother and daughter were chaste and modest. Things changed in that church and we left. I walking through Sam's club one day and here came sister X...I think...
Her long hair was cut off, she had big dangly ear rings on, her make-up was spakled on thick, she had on a black leather jacket, and pants. I politely said hello and she just walked past. I couldn't believe my eyes. How sad. Soon we saw the two daughters, they went the way of the world also. Fashion won the war.Notice the following observations:
Pro 7:9 In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night:
Pro 7:10 And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.
There is an attire that is associated with being a harlot.
Pro 7:11 (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house:
Your outward is a manifestation of your inward.
Pro 7:12 Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.)
The liberated fashion conscieous woman or yourng lady in NOT in her place.
Pro 7:13 So she caught him, and kissed him, and with an impudent face said unto him,
Her behaviour is adversly affected becasue she fits in with the world. She has her eye on your man or boy!
Pro 7:14 I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows.
She goes to your church! I hope not, I pray not, but there it is in black and white.
I used to tell the worldly church girls in a youth group I taught once, when you are living in a trailor, have two or three kids (goats not lambs) up under your feet, the man you live with is not your husband, you have no car, and no one cares about you, you'll remember old Bro. Smith giving you the riot act about dressing modestly and acting chaste! We have been back to that church, we have seen the fulfillment, how utterly sad. Thank God, He is the Lord of second and third chances, but I want my children to go to the altar in glorious, brilliant, pure white. How about you?
Pure children, with countenance bright
Pure children, that walk in light.
Pure children, that love Mom and Dad.
Pure children, that know good from bad.
Pure children, who love God's word.
Pure children, who do what they've heard.
Pure children, that sing of the Christ.
Pure children, will you pay the price?
From my heart,
Bro. Ben