Post by George on Nov 18, 2006 13:11:40 GMT -5
Wives and Submission
By: George Groce
(Eph 5:21) Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
(Eph 5:22) Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
(Eph 5:23) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
(Eph 5:24) Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
(Eph 5:25) Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
(Eph 5:26) That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
(Eph 5:27) That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
(Eph 5:28) So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
(Eph 5:29) For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
(Eph 5:30) For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
(Eph 5:31) For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
This passage of scripture is rather complicated and has been the source of a lot of contention for many years. It has to do with the dynamics between men and women in consideration of The Lord. Let me attempt to go through it and add my own comments and beliefs.
I believe the very first verse shown above to be extremely important to the whole study. It is related to and actually controls the other verses in this passage. Bear in mind as you read through this that the Bible requires a man and a woman submit themselves one to another. There is equality of responsibility there.
Verse 22 requires that wives submit themselves to their husbands. That is emphasized and explained in verses 23 and 24. Let us examine these a little bit.
Verse 22 requires that wives submit to their husbands as to the Lord. That is a pretty stringent requirement. At face it appears this is saying the woman is supposed to do whatever the man wants her to do. In reality it does not say that. There are a large number of qualifiers and caveats. We shall look at that a bit more closely later on.
The first qualifier is found in verse 23. Notice it says that the man is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the Church. We must realize the extent of Christ’s love for the Church. The Church is the body of believers. Jesus Christ loves them more than Himself. He gave His life for the Church. Notice that verse 23 goes on to say “and He is the saviour of the body.” What does that have to do with the relationship between men and women? Let me share with you what Albert Barnes in Barnes’ Notes on the Old and New Testaments has to say. I could not say it any better if I tried.
“And he is the Saviour of the body - That is, of the church, represented as “his body;” see notes, Eph_1:23. The idea here seems to be, that as Christ gave himself to save his body, the church; as he practiced self-denial and made it an object of intense solicitude to preserve that church, so ought the husband to manifest a similar solicitude to make his wife happy, and to save her from want, affliction, and pain. He ought to regard himself as her natural protector; as bound to anticipate and provide for her needs; as under obligation to comfort her in trial, even as Christ does the church. What a beautiful illustration of the spirit which a husband should manifest is the care which Christ has shown for his “bride,” the church!”
As I said, the admonition in the beginning that wives submit to their husbands does not say what it appears to say. There is of course the situation in which the husband might ask or even demand the wife do something that is clearly contrary to God’s Holy Word. In that case the wife is bound to obey God rather than her husband. If you look carefully at the paragraph above from Barnes you will see that the husband is also required to be in submission to the wife. It can be no other way.
In verse 24 there is emphasis on the wife being in subjection to the husband in all things but again is qualified by the requirement of the relationship between Christ and the Church. There is a co-equal and co-existent form of relationship here. It is almost symbiotic in nature. More of this will be addressed shortly.
Before I go any farther let me bring in another vitally important part of the Bible.
(1 Peter 3:7) Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
Live with them according to knowledge. What knowledge? Where do we get knowledge? Knowledge and wisdom come from God. It is through the knowledge and wisdom provided by God that husbands are required to dwell with the wife. Notice the next phrase; “giving honour unto the wife.” It is normal in the New Testament for the word honor to be spelled just that way. It is the ordinary, generic form of the word honor. However in this verse there is a difference even in the English language. It is spelled honour. That is not because it is written in old English. It is written that way to signify a difference in words; and a difference in their meanings.
In this particular use the word honour has a great meaning. It is used most often in the New Testament in relation to the honour we are to give our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. That is a rather high calling. We are to highly esteem and respect our wives in all things. That does not really sound like the wife submitting to the husband in the usual sense of the word. I will add a little more about this doctrine in my summation.
Verse 25 is vitally important to the man in learning how God wants us to interact with our wives. The Bible says we are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church and gave His life for it. That is another high calling and one to adhere to at all times. Christ loved the Church so much He gave His life for it. He went without many things in order to exhibit love to the Church. He put the Church, which is the people who love Him, above Himself in every instance. That is culminated by Him giving His life in order to achieve final victory. It is my firm belief that men ought be willing to give up everything including their very lives in order to protect and love their wife.
Verses 26 and 27 need to be looked at together in my opinion. I do not believe they can be separated.
That he might sanctify - The great object of the Redeemer was to purify and save the church. The meaning here is, that a husband is to manifest similar love toward his wife, and a similar desire that she should be prepared to “walk before him in white”.
And cleanse it with the washing of water – water is the symbol of purity. What we see here is the need to present the marriage pure and chaste in the eyes of The Lord. If you will look farther you will see in 2 Corinthians one of the requirements of a virgin being married is to be washed. It is symbolic of us being washed as clean as snow.
By the word – This is reference to Jesus Christ Himself. In John 1 we see that Jesus is the Word. This is an allusion to truth. Truth must be evident in all aspects of the relationship between men and women. The final purification and sanctification of the marriage is not met by some outward application of anything but rather by the inward cleansing which is achieved by applying the things of the Bible.
That he may present it to himself - In the last day, when he shall receive the church as his spouse to heaven;
A glorious church - A church full of honor, splendor, beauty. The idea of “shining,” or of being “bright,” would convey the sense here. Probably there is still here an allusion to a bride “adorned for her husband” I must also include in reference to the word beauty that beauty is much deeper than physical appearance. It is far more than skin deep. Beauty has a lot to do with one’s countenance. In Proverbs 4:23 we see the command to "keep [our hearts] with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." This is the embodiment of inner beauty. It is the things that shine through from inside that make the outside beautiful.
Not having spot - Not having a stain, a defect, or any impurity - still retaining the allusion to a bride, and to the care taken to remove every blemish.
Or wrinkle - In the vigor and beauty of youth like a bride in whom there is no wrinkle of age.
Or any such thing - Nothing to deform, disfigure, or offend. To this beautiful illustration of the final glory of the church, the apostle was led by the mention of the relation of the husband and the wife.
In verse 28 we see the command that men ought to love their wives as their own bodies. It starts with the word “so.” That is in reference to the things which have preceded this verse. So, because of or therefore, ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. Is there anything I would not do to ensure my own comfort? Will I not make certain I am well fed, warm, peaceful and things of that nature? In return it is my duty under the eyes of God to ensure I do those very same things for my wife. I am bound by that duty to her as I am to Christ.
He that loveth his wife loveth himself. It is apparent by the way the woman is treated whether or not she is loved and whether or not the man loves her as commanded by the Bible. The condition, emotionally, physically and spiritually of the wife will reflect on the love she is shown by the husband. The husband is required to provide an atmosphere in which she can grow and prosper. It is important to understand the husband cannot actually accomplish the emotional, physical and spiritual well being of the wife but the requirement is present that he conduct his relationship with her in such a manner the atmosphere will be conducive to those things.
Verse 29 says that no man yet hated his own flesh. That is very true. This is a continuation of the things taught in verse 28. It is amplification of and emphasis on the amount of love the husband is required to show to his wife. The man nourishes and cherishes his own flesh. There is an interesting tie-in to this in verse 31. I believe the word “cherish” to be one of the most important words in this study. It has great meaning to me. It denotes gentleness, kindness, tenderness, compassion and caring. To cherish is a wonderful thing and is a very real application of love. It is both physically concrete and intangible at the same time. I believe that to cherish is a concept lived out.
The last phrase of verse 29 and all of verse 30 go together. We are members of His body. He loves us so much He has provided that we be well and that good things happen to us. Therefore the same is required of the husband toward the wife. We must not treat her any different than we would treat ourselves keeping in mind the fact we are members of Christ’s body and need to exhibit those qualities in all we do, especially in the marriage.
Verse 31 is undoubtedly the most important of all of this study. It ends by saying the two shall become one flesh. All of the things before this were leading up to this all important statement and requirement. We are so closely intertwined in each other and the Lord there is literally no separation.
This whole doctrine is very difficult for me to put into words. It is a lot about feelings, emotions and deeds. Above I mentioned submission. The two are to become so close I do not believe there is any kind of what I would actually consider submission. If the marriage is conducted with God at the forefront the actual doctrine seems to be more one of cooperation rather than submission. Submission has the connotation of someone virtually ruling in the marriage to the detriment of the other. That ought not be.
By: George Groce
(Eph 5:21) Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
(Eph 5:22) Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
(Eph 5:23) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
(Eph 5:24) Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
(Eph 5:25) Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
(Eph 5:26) That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
(Eph 5:27) That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
(Eph 5:28) So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
(Eph 5:29) For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
(Eph 5:30) For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
(Eph 5:31) For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
This passage of scripture is rather complicated and has been the source of a lot of contention for many years. It has to do with the dynamics between men and women in consideration of The Lord. Let me attempt to go through it and add my own comments and beliefs.
I believe the very first verse shown above to be extremely important to the whole study. It is related to and actually controls the other verses in this passage. Bear in mind as you read through this that the Bible requires a man and a woman submit themselves one to another. There is equality of responsibility there.
Verse 22 requires that wives submit themselves to their husbands. That is emphasized and explained in verses 23 and 24. Let us examine these a little bit.
Verse 22 requires that wives submit to their husbands as to the Lord. That is a pretty stringent requirement. At face it appears this is saying the woman is supposed to do whatever the man wants her to do. In reality it does not say that. There are a large number of qualifiers and caveats. We shall look at that a bit more closely later on.
The first qualifier is found in verse 23. Notice it says that the man is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the Church. We must realize the extent of Christ’s love for the Church. The Church is the body of believers. Jesus Christ loves them more than Himself. He gave His life for the Church. Notice that verse 23 goes on to say “and He is the saviour of the body.” What does that have to do with the relationship between men and women? Let me share with you what Albert Barnes in Barnes’ Notes on the Old and New Testaments has to say. I could not say it any better if I tried.
“And he is the Saviour of the body - That is, of the church, represented as “his body;” see notes, Eph_1:23. The idea here seems to be, that as Christ gave himself to save his body, the church; as he practiced self-denial and made it an object of intense solicitude to preserve that church, so ought the husband to manifest a similar solicitude to make his wife happy, and to save her from want, affliction, and pain. He ought to regard himself as her natural protector; as bound to anticipate and provide for her needs; as under obligation to comfort her in trial, even as Christ does the church. What a beautiful illustration of the spirit which a husband should manifest is the care which Christ has shown for his “bride,” the church!”
As I said, the admonition in the beginning that wives submit to their husbands does not say what it appears to say. There is of course the situation in which the husband might ask or even demand the wife do something that is clearly contrary to God’s Holy Word. In that case the wife is bound to obey God rather than her husband. If you look carefully at the paragraph above from Barnes you will see that the husband is also required to be in submission to the wife. It can be no other way.
In verse 24 there is emphasis on the wife being in subjection to the husband in all things but again is qualified by the requirement of the relationship between Christ and the Church. There is a co-equal and co-existent form of relationship here. It is almost symbiotic in nature. More of this will be addressed shortly.
Before I go any farther let me bring in another vitally important part of the Bible.
(1 Peter 3:7) Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
Live with them according to knowledge. What knowledge? Where do we get knowledge? Knowledge and wisdom come from God. It is through the knowledge and wisdom provided by God that husbands are required to dwell with the wife. Notice the next phrase; “giving honour unto the wife.” It is normal in the New Testament for the word honor to be spelled just that way. It is the ordinary, generic form of the word honor. However in this verse there is a difference even in the English language. It is spelled honour. That is not because it is written in old English. It is written that way to signify a difference in words; and a difference in their meanings.
In this particular use the word honour has a great meaning. It is used most often in the New Testament in relation to the honour we are to give our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. That is a rather high calling. We are to highly esteem and respect our wives in all things. That does not really sound like the wife submitting to the husband in the usual sense of the word. I will add a little more about this doctrine in my summation.
Verse 25 is vitally important to the man in learning how God wants us to interact with our wives. The Bible says we are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church and gave His life for it. That is another high calling and one to adhere to at all times. Christ loved the Church so much He gave His life for it. He went without many things in order to exhibit love to the Church. He put the Church, which is the people who love Him, above Himself in every instance. That is culminated by Him giving His life in order to achieve final victory. It is my firm belief that men ought be willing to give up everything including their very lives in order to protect and love their wife.
Verses 26 and 27 need to be looked at together in my opinion. I do not believe they can be separated.
That he might sanctify - The great object of the Redeemer was to purify and save the church. The meaning here is, that a husband is to manifest similar love toward his wife, and a similar desire that she should be prepared to “walk before him in white”.
And cleanse it with the washing of water – water is the symbol of purity. What we see here is the need to present the marriage pure and chaste in the eyes of The Lord. If you will look farther you will see in 2 Corinthians one of the requirements of a virgin being married is to be washed. It is symbolic of us being washed as clean as snow.
By the word – This is reference to Jesus Christ Himself. In John 1 we see that Jesus is the Word. This is an allusion to truth. Truth must be evident in all aspects of the relationship between men and women. The final purification and sanctification of the marriage is not met by some outward application of anything but rather by the inward cleansing which is achieved by applying the things of the Bible.
That he may present it to himself - In the last day, when he shall receive the church as his spouse to heaven;
A glorious church - A church full of honor, splendor, beauty. The idea of “shining,” or of being “bright,” would convey the sense here. Probably there is still here an allusion to a bride “adorned for her husband” I must also include in reference to the word beauty that beauty is much deeper than physical appearance. It is far more than skin deep. Beauty has a lot to do with one’s countenance. In Proverbs 4:23 we see the command to "keep [our hearts] with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." This is the embodiment of inner beauty. It is the things that shine through from inside that make the outside beautiful.
Not having spot - Not having a stain, a defect, or any impurity - still retaining the allusion to a bride, and to the care taken to remove every blemish.
Or wrinkle - In the vigor and beauty of youth like a bride in whom there is no wrinkle of age.
Or any such thing - Nothing to deform, disfigure, or offend. To this beautiful illustration of the final glory of the church, the apostle was led by the mention of the relation of the husband and the wife.
In verse 28 we see the command that men ought to love their wives as their own bodies. It starts with the word “so.” That is in reference to the things which have preceded this verse. So, because of or therefore, ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. Is there anything I would not do to ensure my own comfort? Will I not make certain I am well fed, warm, peaceful and things of that nature? In return it is my duty under the eyes of God to ensure I do those very same things for my wife. I am bound by that duty to her as I am to Christ.
He that loveth his wife loveth himself. It is apparent by the way the woman is treated whether or not she is loved and whether or not the man loves her as commanded by the Bible. The condition, emotionally, physically and spiritually of the wife will reflect on the love she is shown by the husband. The husband is required to provide an atmosphere in which she can grow and prosper. It is important to understand the husband cannot actually accomplish the emotional, physical and spiritual well being of the wife but the requirement is present that he conduct his relationship with her in such a manner the atmosphere will be conducive to those things.
Verse 29 says that no man yet hated his own flesh. That is very true. This is a continuation of the things taught in verse 28. It is amplification of and emphasis on the amount of love the husband is required to show to his wife. The man nourishes and cherishes his own flesh. There is an interesting tie-in to this in verse 31. I believe the word “cherish” to be one of the most important words in this study. It has great meaning to me. It denotes gentleness, kindness, tenderness, compassion and caring. To cherish is a wonderful thing and is a very real application of love. It is both physically concrete and intangible at the same time. I believe that to cherish is a concept lived out.
The last phrase of verse 29 and all of verse 30 go together. We are members of His body. He loves us so much He has provided that we be well and that good things happen to us. Therefore the same is required of the husband toward the wife. We must not treat her any different than we would treat ourselves keeping in mind the fact we are members of Christ’s body and need to exhibit those qualities in all we do, especially in the marriage.
Verse 31 is undoubtedly the most important of all of this study. It ends by saying the two shall become one flesh. All of the things before this were leading up to this all important statement and requirement. We are so closely intertwined in each other and the Lord there is literally no separation.
This whole doctrine is very difficult for me to put into words. It is a lot about feelings, emotions and deeds. Above I mentioned submission. The two are to become so close I do not believe there is any kind of what I would actually consider submission. If the marriage is conducted with God at the forefront the actual doctrine seems to be more one of cooperation rather than submission. Submission has the connotation of someone virtually ruling in the marriage to the detriment of the other. That ought not be.