Adults that negatively influence our teenagers

[Tyler's Helpmeet]

I would be pretty upset if someone was doing this. My son's father tends to do this (not christian AT ALL though) but I think that is an unfortunate side effect of divorce.

The only thing I can think is maybe this person thinks she is doing the right thing She sees nothing wrong with this and deep in her heart thinks she is saving your child from something.

I guess if it was me I would ponder and pray over what I would say to this person to make it clear that their possibly well meaning advice was unwelcome. It is possible that you may need to distance your family from that family. You have to protect your kids, it is your job and you will answer for it. It may cause some hurt feelings and your child may be angry but oh well!

[Guadalupe]

This is never an easy situation when your child wants to have her friend yet this mother is unhealthy baggage to that friendship. You have two options:
1. Invite the friend to be at your house more often and this will keep her mother away from your daughter.

2. Distract your daughter with new and healthy activities where she can make new friends who are more in line with your values.

Personally I would choose number 2 because it seems to me that your daughter's recent spate of rebelliousness is because of her association with this girl and her mother. Severing that relationship by re-focusing her to new friends would be the easiest way out of it.

Having her participate in an activity such as a Christian girls' softball team or perhaps another group like a sewing group would be best. It would let her see there are other friends to be had and not just this girl. It would broaden her choices for companionship.

Don't tell her you are taking her from her friend (at which she'll rebel). Just start talking positively about the new group and then go with her to some of the new group's activities as a mom and daughter outing. Get a bite to eat and visit the members of the team or group. Afterward tell your daughter how well she seemed to get along with the girls. Keep the conversation about the new group upbeat and positive. By filling your daughter's need for friendship and social activities, this new venture will distract her from the bad fellowship of this mother and her friend.

It appears that this mother is hoping to get extra income by talking your daughter into living with her and then charging her "rent" from the government benefits: I've seen this scenario before. Of course I could be wrong.

Keeping it all in prayer for you.

[sister J]

I felt really uneasy about having it all online so I deleted the original post. Thankyou for the replies, they did really help me.