Behind Every Successful Man is a Woman... Cliche?

[titus2daughter]

Or is it true?........

There were some people talking about this phrase on another message board I am on and thought the responses here would be interesting. Is it really true? The guys on the other board were getting quite offended.

This is what I wrote about it:


(Responding to a guy saying that that comment was stereotypical and unfair)

Yes i'll agree that it is stereotyping but there is some truth the that ya know? Im not saying that every single guy on the face of this earth who is succesful had a woman to back him, nor is it a requirement... but it is true in a lot of cases. And it should be! In Proverbs 31 it says "Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land." He was successful! Partially because of her. That is part of a quality of a virtuous woman, she helps to make her husband successful, while she works in the background. I have seen it proven over and over and over again in families. Isn't that what a marriage is all about? Two people working together to bring Glory to the Lord (in a christians eyes - that is successful) And often the man is the one that is the "spokesperson" so the speak because thats how God made him. So theoretically, they're both successful, but often the man is the one that gets public credit for it. And I'm not begrudging him that credit. I would prefer it that way because isn't that a wife's job? To support her husband and make him look as successful (in the Lords will of course) as possible?

(someone else wrote:)
see now... some people would get all offended to think that the woman is 'behind' the man... not 'beside' where she belongs, dya get what I'm sayin?

(back to my writings)
I would prefer being behind the man! That's where my place is anyway right? He is my authority. I can serve alongside but ultimately I am behind him.


Anyway those are just my thoughts on the matter...
*ducking out before the guys get mad*


Again just to prove my point. In Genesis 2: 18 & 20 The Lord says calls the woman a "help meet", one who helps, "a help as his counterpart" = a help suitable to him, a wife" - Easton's 1897 Bible Dictionary. Again, woman are created to support the guy. To help make his dreams come true. Because since "they shall be one flesh." (Genesis 2:24) shouldn't they be your dreams to?

Behind every successful man is a woman.
And in front of every fulfilled woman is a successful man.


So what do you think?

[George]

Well now let us see....What exactly do you consider successful? Let me give you myself as example. Please understand this is not meant in amy kind of prideful way or to attempt to say I am better than anyone else or anything of that nature. My opinion and driving force is that I believe after what God has done for me there is little I can do to even scratch the surface of what I owe Him. Not only did He rescue me from a life of drugs and alcohol, He gave me eternal life!

First of all as far as my secular life is concerned I am retired after completing a career of almost 35 years with the same governmental agency. I live comfortable although I am not well to do by any means. Is that successful?

I am the lay leader of a ministry in my Church. I am a preacher. (Not a Pastor) I sing in our choir as well as singing specials. I am a bus captain. I am an Awana leader. I work as an usher when needed. I operate the light panel for services when needed. I assist with moderating an on-line forum that has an international presence. I spend a good portion of each day except Sunday working in maintenance at my Church and our Christian School. I write Bible studies and articles. I love the Lord, my God, with all my heart and all my mind and all my soul.

Does any of that make me successful?

I am not trying to be facetious or sarcastic. The reason I have written this and the reason I ask is that I am a single man. Now the statement is that behind "every" successful man there is a woman. If you consider any of the things I have written here to be such to consider me successful in any then the word "every" does not apply.

In Christ,
George

[benshelpmeet]

Good point brother George...one does not have to be married to be successful. If a mans heart is toward the Lord and he's sold out to God, and follows the Lord's leadings in his life, he is successful, in the truest sense.


I do want to add, that when a man has a wife, she can be a burden or a blessing. She can drag him down or build him up. The way she lives her life is important. Her role as a wife is important, and her role as helpmeet and mother to his children. Her personal christian walk and testimony reflects upon her dear husband.

I know many a pastor, or man of God (preacher), who can not seem to do ''all they could'' for the Lord, because their wife and children drag them down and taint his testimony as leader, and even provider (the wife works outside the home and provides too) . These women do not get behind their husbands, they do not have the same convictions, or same desires toward God, they think he is too strict, or old fashioned. They show him and everyone else by their actions (the way they dress, the things they partake in) that they do not back their husband in his convictions and heart toward the Lord.

Many and I mean many churches across America are suffering because of these type of women who do not get behind their husband and back his godly decisions and desires toward God. This is a crying shame. The work of God is greatly hindered by these selfish, stubborn women.

Many a godly man who could be successful for the Lord, and with their family are thwarted, by their wife and children. If their wives would get behind them and back their decisions in the home and in the church, then the Lord could do a ''mighty work'', and because of his success with his wife and family (being a god leader) they could also have godly success with their church. But alas... The woman wont get in her rightful place.

Her place is not just an outward place, but an inward place (heart position) of respect, love, reverence, strong conviction toward God and the things of God, to uplift her man in his desires toward the Lord...

These type of wives frustrate me. If they have a godly husband with hearts toward the Lord, thy are a fool for not following and backing him.

And if a woman has a week, carnally minded husband that is saved, she should love her husband, and talk to him often about the things of God, and pray ''fervently'' for him, for God to guide his footsteps, and convict his heart, and change his desires.

And if woman is married to an unsaved man, she should love him, pay ''fervently'' for God to save him, she should win him with her conversation, lifestyle, godly love toward him and toward her God.

May I add... if a woman has a saved, godly man, she should pray ''fervently'' for Him too , and love, and respect him, and back his decisions toward God. And be so thankful you have a good man who's heart is toward the Lord.

~ sister Darlene ~

[mom2fourblessings]

I think the saying is a bit off, personally, as many successful men are unmarried.. and men do not need a woman to be successful.. That being said however,

for the men that are married, I do think that their woman can make them or break them. A pushy, bossy, controling woman, who does not support her man or respect him, will end up causing him grief and low self esteem, and well if a man has to constantly worry about what is going on in his home, how can he concentrate on what is going on elsewhere. Also as wives we are called to lift our husbands up in prayer constantly, and to support them with prayer in everything they do.

There have been times when I did not agree with Josh on certain issues, or purchases or job changes etc.. however, instead of trying to push my will, I would share why I was afraid of what he was doing with him, but then reassure him that I was here and would support him no matter what he decided to do, and tell him honestly that I was praying for God's guidance for him and that I wanted him to do whatever, he felt God was guiding him to do, occasionally he has changed his mind, and told me that after much prayer he has decided not to do whatever, other times, he has reassured me that it will be ok, and that God is leading him in a certain direction, (i.e. job change) and that he was going to do it.. EVERYTIME things were handled this way they worked out for the best..like the job change, I was scared to death, but just prayed and told him no matter what, I knew he would do what was right for our family, and I did not doubt for one fraction of a second that he would provide for us.. well, he changed jobs, and took a pretty hefty pay cut on his hourly wage, but because of their better retirement plan and better but cheaper insurance, he actually cleared more money each pay check, has better hours, AND when all was said and done at the end of 3 years, he has topped out making much more than the other job.. Also, only months after he left the other job, his entire department was done away with, and the site is not running near as many people, and the job he is in now that hired 300 when they hired him, has not hired again since then.. So had he listened to my fears or had I been pushy about it, then he would be jobless right now and we would be homeless probably.. Anyway that is just one example..

What I am trying to say about the saying, is that as wives and women, we have the opportunity to help our men be successful in anything they do, or we have the opportunity to drag them down and hurt them.. If we take our God given position in the family, then our husbands go to work knowing, that when they come home, the house will be in order, the bills paid, the children taken care of, food prepared, clothes clean, and then they are able to leave the next morning and do their jobs, be successful and not worry about what is going on at home, "The heart of her husband trusteth in her...."
I know that early on in my marriage, I was that pushy, bossy, controling woman, if I didn't agree with what Josh was doing I would argue, nag, get mad, not speak, withold myself from him, etc.. oh just every "feminist" trick in the book, if anyone even mentioned letting him make decisions or be the man of the house, or mentioned Biblical submission, respect, or the fact that he was responsible for the household, I would argue, rant, rave, and tell them they were old fashion and insane.. I was your typical modern "liberated" woman.. Boy if only I had realized sooner how enslaved I really was and what true women's liberation is.. ;D
I look back now and see how badly I was hurting my husband, he was just going along, trying to be the man, but I was running him over, so he was just like a robot, or something, he did what he had to do to survive.. he has actually said to me now, that at that time, he felt like I had neutered him mentally and physically, he said he felt like less than a man.. I hate so badly that I made him EVER feel that way..

So for the saying.. I think that it is a semi feminist saying trying to promote that a man could not be successful without a woman.. which is not true, but...for those men who have a woman, she can do a lot to make him successful, or to make him less of a man, and more of a robot on autopilot without any care as to whether or not he leads his family.. I mean a person can only be slapped down so many times before they will finally just not get back up, and if a woman continually takes her husband's God given role, eventually, he won't try to take it back..

Just my 2 cents worth, and it ain't worth that much..

Sorry to ramble..

In Christ's Love,
Heather