Teaching your little girls

[debelynne]

Calling out to all the dear sisters out there...I have a problem...I have not always wore skirts/dresses...blue jeans and pants were a big part of my wardrobe if not the only thing...My oldest daughters are not to the point of giving up pants 18/20 they were raised not knowing the difference...but my little four year old has wore pants in the past and now mom is making her give up her favorite pants...which she was taught nothing was wrong with them until recently...she was very happy about wearing dresses all the time until a certain individual who is important to her told her that her mother was wrong...how do you tell a child that something is wrong when she has been taught different in the beginning...and she was all ready to pack away all her Disney movies with magic in them until we came to her favorite and she cried terribly...I decided to rid our house of them when she wasn't helping me...have any of you ladies had this problem? How did you handle it?...remember everyone in our life's and our church the ladies wear pants...I do make a point of pointing out all the ladies we see in town wearing skirts and dresses and she giggles...but I think I might have a battle when she goes to school...any advice would be greatly appreciated...Love and prayers...Debbie

[benshelpmeet]

Dear Debbie,

You are her mama and she is only four years old, shes loves this lady she calls Nana and she being so young may not be able to make the right decission. She might yeild to peer pressure. You could try letting her decide, or on the other hand you could tell her mommy has been wrong about wareing pants because God calls it an abomination to ware a mans garment take her to... Deuteronomy 22:5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so [are] abomination unto the LORD thy God.....You are her mother and her athority before God the Lord wants us to train up our children and to guide their path...Tell her we need to honor the Lord with our lives Zoe, the Lord does not want women or even little women or even baby women to ware pants and from now on we are going to honor the Lord and not ware Pants anymore.We have lead our children like this and it has worked fine all these years. Our children have very strong convictions because we train them in the Word.

Sharing the truth in love~ Darlene ~

[debelynne]

Thank you ladies for your wonderful advice...we are doing find, and Zoe really loves wearing dresses until someone puts something else in her head, but I just keep talking to her about what is right and we just need to pray for the other ladies who don't know or understand...thanks again and by the way...my oldest one (20) is working at the Grand Canyon this summer and she is very out doorsy gal...but with my sharing with her over the phone my convictions she went out and bought 6 skirts...but she did tell me "mom don't think I am going to work out with a skirt on or go rock climbing with a skirt on" I just laughed and felt blessed that she is finally understanding what I have been saying about women looking more feminine in dresses the way the Lord made us...Have a great Lord's Day...Love Sister Debbie

[quaitefarm]

Dear Debbie,

My daughters were 10, 17 &19 when I gave up wear pants. I decided not to worry about the older two as they were both off living on their own and started on the younger one. I didn't make a big deal out of it. She all ready had Sunday School dresses and had to wear dresses as part of her school uniform but she played in pants and shorts during the summer. When the next summer came her shorts were to small and we replaced them with play dresses. When she out grew her pants they were replaced with dresses only if she needed dresses. Otherwise they were not replaced. Now she wears nothing else but dresses and doesn't even ask for pants. The only requirement we made for our older daughters was that they had to wear dresses if they were going out with us, they already wore them to church. Now they wear nothing but dresses.

Susan

[benshelpmeet]

Dear sisters,

I wanted to make a comment. There are alot of people who contact me by e-mail and pm me who have found this site.Alot are having problems like this. I do not want them to read this and get the wrong impression. We as parents have been given a great responsibility and athority over our children while there under our roof. We as parents need to take the bull of wrong choices by the horn and guide our children by telling them they can or can not do questionable things. We should not let them make there own decissions, because they will more times than one make the wrong choice or take a lesser stand for the Lord justifying there choices ( so in so does it and there good christians). Anyone who has raised children knows this is true. (Adults even do it) Therefore we must tell our children what we want them to wear, who they should hang around, what practices they can be involved in etc...We need to guide their choices...Thats why God has made us the parent! If it is some thing we do not have a peace over we should say do not do that or get rid of that item. Period... We do not have to give a good court of law reason, having to convence the child we are making the right decission...If were not asking them to sin they should obey our desire. We are doing what we feel is in the best intrest for our child.

Pants are an abomination acording to Gods Word (Deu 22:5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so [are] abomination unto the LORD thy God. ), because in the begining of the origon of pants it was a mans garment.( And it still is). I can hear the librals already...Thats old testiment. Well look at this verse that was written before Deut.22:5...(Deut7:9 Know therefore that the LORD thy God, he [is] God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;) It's not been 1000 generations yet. We should tell our girls that we are going to obey God and not ware pants or anything questionable or less than.

That's all I wanted to say. Thats the stand Bro. Ben and I take on this subject.


Have a Wonderful Day! And God Bless, ~ sister Darlene ~

[MrsDeweySmith]

We should not let them make there own decisions, because they will more times than one make the wrong choice or take a lesser stand for the Lord justifying there choices ( so in so does it and there good Christians). Anyone who has raised children knows this is true. (Adults even do it) Therefore we must tell our children what we want them to wear, who they should hang around, what practices they can be involved in etc...We need to guide their choices...Thats why God has made us the parent! If it is some thing we do not have a peace over we should say do not do that or get rid of that item. Period... We do not have to give a good court of law reason having to convince the child we are making the right decission...

AMEN Sister Darlene!
Remember the other day when I mentioned having a post written on this subject, yet the computer ate it....THIS was my thought process exactly.

OK, do I follow it in my own family? Sadly, no, I don't. I do most of the time, but I am not consistent by any means. I know I am creating far more confusion in the hearts of my children by doing that, yet I try to find rational reasons...jsut as you mentioned.

It's wrong. It's simply wrong. We don't let our children engage in smoking or drinking...why? Because they are children, it is evil and wrong, it is damaging to their well-being...the list could go on. But, we can rationalize all sorts of scapegoats for dressing in very inappropriate fashions, using language that is not appropriate (the popular, fad type of things....) So and So does it....So and So wears [whatever] and they are among the most Godly people we know! Does that make it right to do, OK to do? No. (Remember our parents...if so and so jumped off a bridge, would you do it with them? We thought it ridiculous growing up to hear such foolish comments, yet we do it all the time in other areas...)

If we, as adults, have been convicted of something and believe in our hearts that it is something sinful, or leading to sinful acts/influences, we must take a stand and make it a rule for everyone in the family, or everyone under the roof. If it's a sin for one, it's surely a sin for all.

The Bible is black and white, I believe. We (and oh boy do I mean ME here... ) need to stop reading the gray areas that many churches provide us with as personal commentary and get back to understanding the Word the way it was intended...seeking the Lord at every crossed T and every dotted I

Deanna

[rejoice]

Darlene,
I deleted my 2 posts. I didn't want to give anyone the impression that I was encouraging parents to allow their "children" to do as they wanted. That is not what I meant at ALL by my messages. If they were giving THAT message it was better that I deleted them.

[MrsDeweySmith]

Dear Sister 'Rejoice"

I'm sorry if my response sounded as though I was condemning anyone or speaking against your posts on the topic. That certainly was not my intention at all

I was really speaking out more against myself than anything. I have children who are leaning into the world and its attractions as much as they can...and it's obvious I allow it, while sitting here praying hard against it. I was speaking out against my inconsistencies in child training, my lack of a direct stand on areas I truly feel are important. I have lived in the world and been of the world for the better (worst) half of my life. I have sampled the evils it offers and I have finally recognized it for what it is...fallen sins repeated, pure wicked evil.

Yet I make mistakes over and over again as I try to find a place to live between both worlds...the Lord's Kingdom and the world I must reside in until called home. I know in my heart it is wrong, I pray against it, yet I follow advice of men (my well-meaning Christian friends...) and it brings me to falter every time.

I believe children can and should be taught to follow the Bible, letter for letter. Peer pressure should mean nothing to them as they should see the Lord as their only 'pressure' so to speak. But the world we are in teaches us that we will drive children away if we push issues, especially religion, on them, or dictate rules of household and living upon them. I all too often start believing these lies...and they are lies, because Scripture says that we CAN train them up in His Ways and they will not depart from them. We have the ability, the strength, and the God-ordained duties to do so.

And for all of my rambling here, I am really preaching to the person sitting at my own computer monitor I'm sorry if I seemed to jump into your own screen and comment ill-advised as it were. But for the Grace of Our Lord, I would fail at this endeavor wholly.

Please keep responding and posting. I love hearing from everyone here and seeing glimpses of their place on the Path to Glory!

Deanna